{"id":273,"date":"2014-10-24T15:45:56","date_gmt":"2014-10-24T05:45:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/janineprince.com\/?p=273"},"modified":"2015-01-30T14:26:56","modified_gmt":"2015-01-30T04:26:56","slug":"tears-fragile-path-to-freedom","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/janineprince.com\/home\/tears-fragile-path-to-freedom\/","title":{"rendered":"Tears’ fragile path to freedom"},"content":{"rendered":"

There\u2019s a common\u00a0assumption that freedom equals happiness in a simplified \u201cwe all lived happily ever after\u201d kindof way. Just in case you\u2019re not sure, that is a fantasy. It is of very little use to any of us.<\/p>\n

\"The<\/a>Our\u00a0yearning for\u00a0freedom\u00a0has us\u00a0seeking all of the elements that might contribute to the alchemy we know as\u00a0contentment (often confused with the showy cousin \u201chappiness\u201d) but there’s a glitch in the mix and we need to address it.<\/p>\n

If freedom\u00a0did equal\u00a0happiness, being sad\u00a0or upset would exclude anyone from the possibility of freedom. We often try and cover over sadness quickly, move on from it, deny it. It is too awkward to dwell on and, of course, it is painful but it is part of being human, it is part of a full life. Lately we’ve lost track of that a little bit by venerating the heroic outsider.<\/p>\n

Our culture has confused the idea of individualism with the\u00a0physical reality of us as\u00a0individuals.\u00a0It is a sad and recent development. (This could quickly easily be perceived as a political argument as these terms are used in political contexts but that is not the intent here. If you look up the political elements, or want to follow these other tangents, please feel welcome to do so. We’ll still be here when you come back.)<\/p>\n

Basically for most of us, this\u00a0has lead\u00a0to a fundamental loss of feeling that we belong. However there is something we\u2019ve all experienced that can lead us back into connection and\u00a0that is our tears.<\/p>\n

Life is not all glowing unicorns pooping rainbow cupcakes of joy and cash. Bad shit happens.<\/p>\n

People you love get horribly sick, people you don\u2019t know drive into you, your body isn\u2019t perfect, we age, we suffer. It is a lot to bear and sometimes we cry. It can feel like we cry a river of tears.
\nThere\u2019s nothing to say in the moment that will take that gut wrenching away. That pain is real. It is what it is. It really does hurt. And yes probably most of what caused it is unfair in some way, and our egos want to shout that out and shut down that pain.<\/p>\n

Underneath that, after the rawness, there\u2019s an opportunity for something else. Those hot tears and the salt of our body have forced themselves from our body to honour the depth and meaning of the connection with the people in the situation, that situation that you were so deeply part of that you felt that pain. If we were disengaged, we wouldn’t feel that pain. If we didn\u2019t belong there, it would be so much harder to feel even empathy. The connection existed and so the pain that exploded within you is because<\/em> of that connection.<\/p>\n

It is such a valuable clue. We are so much more than just one-dimensional figures on spreadsheets. In the face of an onslaught of advertising\u00a0working tirelessly to push us into purchasing things we don’t need\u00a0to assuage fears we didn’t have, in the face of that and inside ourselves we know these truths. That love is real, that when you love you can be hurt.<\/p>\n

Our sorrows are personal but lament connects us to the human condition, reminds us of the love and respect that we have for others and that they have for us. We belong in enmeshed relationships with responsibilities and expectations of trust and value.<\/p>\n

It sounds unlikely, but tears make a fragile path to a powerful place. They signify our internal eternal freedom, they reflect our ability to hold true to our love and our values. It is inside of love and our own values that we find our own anchors to freedom.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There\u2019s a common\u00a0assumption that freedom equals happiness in a simplified \u201cwe all lived happily ever after\u201d kindof way. Just in case you\u2019re not sure, that is a fantasy. It is of very little use to any of us. Our\u00a0yearning for\u00a0freedom\u00a0has us\u00a0seeking all of the elements that might contribute to the alchemy we know as\u00a0contentment (often […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[45,38,34,60,30,61],"class_list":["post-273","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-consumption","tag-freedom","tag-philosophy","tag-tears","tag-tides","tag-water"],"yoast_head":"\nTears' fragile path to freedom - Janine Prince<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/janineprince.com\/home\/tears-fragile-path-to-freedom\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Tears' fragile path to freedom - Janine Prince\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"There\u2019s a common\u00a0assumption that freedom equals happiness in a simplified \u201cwe all lived happily ever after\u201d kindof way. 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